Zoomers, I need help with Bitcoin

Thogrim

The Emperor protects
Old World Underground
Sorry to be such gen x but what do I do now. It wants a picture of my drivers license and shit at the coinstar site, do i download this shit to anonymous wallet.
If someone would kindly step through so I can donate this 100.00 i just turned into bitcoin. I used a small amount because I dont know how this is going turn out.
 

TrumpDinduNFn

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Sorry to be such gen x but what do I do now. It wants a picture of my drivers license and shit at the coinstar site, do i download this shit to anonymous wallet.
If someone would kindly step through so I can donate this 100.00 i just turned into bitcoin. I used a small amount because I dont know how this is going turn out.
Everyone says it’s so easy.... I don’t understand any of the steps :) Congrats on the first step
 

fukuyama

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Sorry to be such gen x but what do I do now. It wants a picture of my drivers license and shit at the coinstar site, do i download this shit to anonymous wallet.
If someone would kindly step through so I can donate this 100.00 i just turned into bitcoin. I used a small amount because I dont know how this is going turn out.
external-content.duckduckgo.com.jpeg
 

Thogrim

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Old World Underground
Assign me one since it's so important
Hey do you know a trusted PC wallet, I dont have a smart phone. @AndrewAnglin hey I got your coffee money today. Yeah i went down and finally did it and I want to make it a regular thing but is there a trusted "wallet" for PC. I am new at this bitcoin game so please bear with me, I dont own a smart phone never have. this mycelium app seems to work only for android or apple phones. Its going to take time for coinstar to go through my drivers license I scanned in but i want to make sure this bit coin goes to an anonymous wallet if i can.
 

Ironring

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Hey do you know a trusted PC wallet, I dont have a smart phone. @AndrewAnglin hey I got your coffee money today. Yeah i went down and finally did it and I want to make it a regular thing but is there a trusted "wallet" for PC. I am new at this bitcoin game so please bear with me, I dont own a smart phone never have. this mycelium app seems to work only for android or apple phones. Its going to take time for coinstar to go through my drivers license I scanned in but i want to make sure this bit coin goes to an anonymous wallet if i can.
Bitcoin Armory or Electrum are popular desktop wallets. Until you move this around a few times I wouldn't use large amounts of BTC for anything.

If you get into BTC there are a couple of different paths you can take for safely storing larger amounts. Since that's not what you asked, I won't bore you with that right now.
 

Mistaf

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Hey do you know a trusted PC wallet, I dont have a smart phone. @AndrewAnglin hey I got your coffee money today. Yeah i went down and finally did it and I want to make it a regular thing but is there a trusted "wallet" for PC. I am new at this bitcoin game so please bear with me, I dont own a smart phone never have. this mycelium app seems to work only for android or apple phones. Its going to take time for coinstar to go through my drivers license I scanned in but i want to make sure this bit coin goes to an anonymous wallet if i can.
Electrum is a wallet you can set up on your computer. But really, read the piece Anglin's written and go from there.
 

Mistaf

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If you get into BTC there are a couple of different paths you can take for safely storing larger amounts.
I'd be interested. Any reading material you would recommend?
 

Thogrim

The Emperor protects
Old World Underground
Bitcoin Armory or Electrum are popular desktop wallets. Until you move this around a few times I wouldn't use large amounts of BTC for anything.

If you get into BTC there are a couple of different paths you can take for safely storing larger amounts. Since that's not what you asked, I won't bore you with that right now.
I usually just invest in silver, but I am going to become a philanthropist and trying to get a monthly payment into the site. We cannot have this site go down, we just cant.
 

Thogrim

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Old World Underground
Electrum is a wallet you can set up on your computer. But really, read the piece Anglin's written and go from there.
I did- it was talking about mycelium, and i was just looking for a PC alternative.
 

Ironring

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I'd be interested. Any reading material you would recommend?
I was thinking of hardware wallets and software wallets. The bitcoin wiki :


Ledger is a brand of hardware wallet.

Advantages and disadvantages to software wallets like mycelium.

I think it boils down to your threat profile which one is "better".
 

Ironring

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which one is? I plan on putting it in there and getting it out just as quickly
I'm saying which one is better is a matter of opinion. But yes, just do what Anglin said and substitute Electrum for Mycelium.

You might send a test amount to your buddy for like $2 just to test your setup out.
 

Mistaf

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which one is? I plan on putting it in there and getting it out just as quickly
Well, a hardware wallet is more or less unhackable since it's offline and you only plug it in for transactions. If there's no risk of theft or losing it, that seems to be the safest route to go, especially for larger sums. If you're talking about only a couple of hundreds and are still in the process of familiarizing yourself with the whole thing an Electrum wallet or something similar might be the easiest solution.
 

JeffCarzo

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Can someone tell me the reason why the instructions say to get the PC app and the mobile app and move the money from one to the other before donating? I got the money in the mobile app, but had trouble with the PC app. I'll work on it again if someone can explain the purpose for it, otherwise I can just donate from the mobile app where it's already sitting.
 

Donk

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Escaped True Master
The gibbering idiot's guide to donating bitcoin

For people with missing or extra chromosomes

The Complete Retard's Guide is super complicated and confusing, but I took the plunge and did it anyway. Turns out it's way easier that it sounds than when you read it on the Retards's Guide. It is designed for even the most thick of normies to be able to use, and it tells you what do to in a very straight-forward way. There is no way to fuck it up. It is incredibly simple.

STEP 1: You get a Coinbase App on your phone and link your bank account so you can buy bitcoin (or open a Coinme account on the Coinstar site if you are going to do it the cash way). Think of this as like opening a "bank account." Yes, you have to scan your ID. Just do it, this 'murica nigga. All you're doing is opening an account the same as a bank, but for crypto. Shitloads of people are doing it all the time.

STEP 2: Buy bitcoins from the exchange app (or put money in the Coinstar machine and collect the receipt with the code for your bitcoins, and enter it to add your bitcoins to your account). Here's the thing: on the exchange there is a delay. You have to wait before you can move your bitcoins around. So just chill and wait until they're released. It took mine like 5 days. With Coinstar cash, there may not be a delay, I'm not sure about that method. All you're doing is converting dollars into crypto into your "crypto bank account." That's all it is.

STEP 3: Get a "wallet." The app Mycelium. When the waiting period is over, you can move your bitcoins to this wallet (not sure if there is a delay with Coinstar + cash). It is self-explanatory. It is seriously obvious, you can't fuck it up. What it is, is like moving your bitcoins from your "crypto bank account" into your "wallet" so you can actually spend them.

Step 4: Now that you can spend your bitcoins from your Mycelium wallet, you spend them on the DS. You poke your booger-hook on the "send" button, then poke "send full balance," and then when your phone camera starts, you point it at that creepy-ass square bar code thing that's bigger'n shit on the DS website, and the code for the DS wallet loads which is instant. Then you click "send." It will send it to the DS' wallet. You can see it appear on the blockchain thing, which is like a bank transfer ledger.

Ultimately, you just do it. It's seriously easy. Even a total gibbering idiot with missing or extra chromosomes can do it. Don't be afraid even though is wants your ID to open the "crypto bank account."


Now, what happened to me was this:

I bought 100-ish usd of bitcoins on the exchange, but then I had to WAIT until I could move them to the mycelium wallet to be able to spend them on the DS. In the meantime, I started looking into these cryptos, and ended up swapping 50% of them on some random cheap crypto shit that I was sure was gonna make me a millionaire in a week. Then that turned out to be stupid, so I switched them back to bitcoin. Then I accidentally tuned half of that into cash again and had to send it back to my bank as cash, because I was wigging out that I couldn't spend the bitcoin and just started rattling my dickbeaters over the phone screen trying things out. Then I moved what was left to a desktop wallet, then back into my mycelium wallet because it seemed like that would be like super stealth. The thing is, each of these transactions costs a fee. So by the time it was all said and done, I was only able to send a portion of the funds to the DS.

So here's the thing: Follow the steps, and once your bitcoins are in your Mycelium wallet, just send SOME of it to the DS, then send SOME MORE to the DS so the numbers are broken up. I think that is a way to confuse the system and make it obscure. Correct me if I'm wrong.

It is really easy. It just takes a couple steps and remember, there is a delay. Even though the Complete Retard's Guide may seem complicated, just quit looking at the words and do the motions. Follow the prompts. It is self-explanatory, and you will be fine. It is even easier than it sounds when I wrote it. It's almost too simple to even put into words! Just get drunk and do it. It feels fantastic. Quit thinking about it so much and do it, faggot.
 
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Thogrim

The Emperor protects
Old World Underground
y
The gibbering idiot's guide to donating bitcoin

For people with missing or extra chromosomes

The Complete Retard's Guide is super complicated and confusing, but I took the plunge and did it anyway. Turns out it's way easier that it sounds than when you read it on the Retards's Guide. It is designed for even the most thick of normies to be able to use, and it tells you what do to in a very straight-forward way. There is no way to fuck it up. It is incredibly simple.

STEP 1: You get a Coinbase App on your phone and link your bank account so you can buy bitcoin (or open a Coinme account on the Coinstar site if you are going to do it the cash way). Think of this as like opening a "bank account." Yes, you have to scan your ID. Just do it, this 'murica nigga. All you're doing is opening an account the same as a bank, but for crypto. Shitloads of people are doing it all the time.

STEP 2: Buy bitcoins from the exchange app (or put money in the Coinstar machine and collect the receipt with the code for your bitcoins, and enter it to add your bitcoins to your account). Here's the thing: on the exchange there is a delay. You have to wait before you can move your bitcoins around. So just chill and wait until they're released. It took mine like 5 days. With Coinstar cash, there may not be a delay, I'm not sure about that method. All you're doing is converting dollars into crypto into your "crypto bank account." That's all it is.

STEP 3: Get a "wallet." The app Mycelium. When the waiting period is over, you can move your bitcoins to this wallet (not sure if there is a delay with Coinstar + cash). It is self-explanatory. It is seriously obvious, you can't fuck it up. What it is, is like moving your bitcoins from your "crypto bank account" into your "wallet" so you can actually spend them.

Step 4: Now that you can spend your bitcoins from your Mycelium wallet, you spend them on the DS. You poke your booger-hook on the "send" button, then poke "send full balance," and then when your phone camera starts, you point it at that creepy-ass square bar code thing that's bigger'n shit on the DS website, and the code for the DS wallet loads which is instant. Then you click "send." It will send it to the DS' wallet. You can see it appear on the blockchain thing, which is like a bank transfer ledger.

Ultimately, you just do it. It's seriously easy. Even a total gibbering idiot with missing or extra chromosomes can do it. Don't be afraid even though is wants your ID to open the "crypto bank account."


Now, what happened to me was this:

I bought 100-ish usd of bitcoins on the exchange, but then I had to WAIT until I could move them to the mycelium wallet to be able to spend them on the DS. In the meantime, I started looking into these cryptos, and ended up swapping 50% of them on some random cheap crypto shit that I was sure was gonna make me a millionaire in a week. Then that turned out to be stupid, so I switched them back to bitcoin. Then I accidentally tuned half of that into cash again and had to send it back to my bank as cash, because I was wigging out that I couldn't spend the bitcoin and just started rattling my dickbeaters over the phone screen trying things out. Then I moved what was left to a desktop wallet, then back into my mycelium wallet because it seemed like that would be like super stealth. The thing is, each of these transactions costs a fee. So by the time it was all said and done, I was only able to send a portion of the funds to the DS.

So here's the thing: Follow the steps, and once your bitcoins are in your Mycelium wallet, just send SOME of it to the DS, then send SOME MORE to the DS so the numbers are broken up. I think that is a way to confuse the system and make it obscure. Correct me if I'm wrong.

It is really easy. It just takes a couple steps and remember, there is a delay. Even though the Complete Retard's Guide may seem complicated, just quit looking at the words and do the motions. Follow the prompts. It is self-explanatory, and you will be fine. It is even easier than it sounds when I wrote it. It's almost too simple to even put into words! Just get drunk and do it. It feels fantastic. Quit thinking about it so much and do it, faggot.
Yeah, I scanned my license, i just dont have a cell foam, I will figure it out. I have 100 ish in bitcoin that will be the DS by the end of the week
 

MoonmanJones

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On the off-chance it'll help someone I'll provide details for acquiring bitcoin through CashApp (after setting up Electrum/Mycelium), since it's not straightforward:
  1. Install the app and let it scan your driver's license and give it your checking account info and whatever else it wants so you can use it.
  2. Tap the little bank icon on the left side of the row of icons at the bottom to open the Banking menu, then tap "Add Cash" and add however much you want to donate. (It'll be withdrawn from the account you gave it.)
  3. Tap the squiggly line icon in the bottom row of icons to open the Investing menu, then tap the Bitcoin tab at the top. Scroll down a little and tap "Buy". Enter the desired amount of money and it'll be converted to bitcoin.
  4. Tap the bank icon again. Scroll down a little and tap "Bitcoin". Scroll down a little and tap "Withdraw Bitcoin". Enter the amount and the address of your Electrum/Mycelium wallet. If you're using Electrum you can call up the QR code for your wallet and scan it; if you're using Mycelium you can copy/paste the address.
  5. The bitcoin will appear in your wallet. As the program you're using will indicate, you can't send them at this point; you need to wait for "confirmations" to happen first, which will take less than an hour.
 

MoonLaser

Active member
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Sorry to be such gen x but what do I do now. It wants a picture of my drivers license and shit at the coinstar site, do i download this shit to anonymous wallet.
If someone would kindly step through so I can donate this 100.00 i just turned into bitcoin. I used a small amount because I dont know how this is going turn out.
SEND IT TO ME, I'LL DONATE FOR YOU AND ADD 10%.
 
Last edited:

MichaelWittmann

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I just did what @Andrew Anglin said in his article. It's easy. I've also made some purchases from Amazon using bitcoin to reload an Amazon gift card, and it worked fine.
 

Donk

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Escaped True Master
y

Yeah, I scanned my license, i just dont have a cell foam, I will figure it out. I have 100 ish in bitcoin that will be the DS by the end of the week
Yup, one of the reasons I finally gave in and got a sail foam after all these years was to make this process easier.
 

Seger

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Hey do you know a trusted PC wallet, I dont have a smart phone. @AndrewAnglin hey I got your coffee money today. Yeah i went down and finally did it and I want to make it a regular thing but is there a trusted "wallet" for PC. I am new at this bitcoin game so please bear with me, I dont own a smart phone never have. this mycelium app seems to work only for android or apple phones. Its going to take time for coinstar to go through my drivers license I scanned in but i want to make sure this bit coin goes to an anonymous wallet if i can.
I did- it was talking about mycelium, and i was just looking for a PC alternative.
You want Electrum, from https://electrum.org/.

People here seem to have trouble understanding simple instructions. I can't tell you how American sites work, but here is a quick primer on how Bitcoin works:

* You have a program on your computer, called a "Bitcoin wallet". This works like online banking, but it's totally unregulated. If the kikes don't like where you're sending money, too bad, but if you get defrauded or hacked, also too bad.
* The Bitcoin wallet keeps an account for you (the details are horribly complicated). You can hold bitcoins in there, you can receive bitcoins from other people, and you can send them to other people. That's all. No controls or anything - if you send them to the wrong person, too bad.

Here is how you install and use Electrum:

1. Go to https://electrum.org/#download
2. Select "Windows installer"
3. Install it

Follow the instructions/default settings:
4. Select "auto connect" when it asks about servers
5. Let it create the wallet in the default path
6. Select "standard wallet"
7. Select "create a new seed"
8. Select "segwit"
9. Take a pen and paper, write down the 12 words that come up, and put it in a drawer somewhere. (These words allow anyone to access your account, so don't post them anywhere)
10. Put a password if you'd like, although it's not that important
11. You now have an (empty) wallet.

Now, go to the receive tab. There will be a "receiving address". It should look something like bc1<long string of characters> or 1<long string of characters>.

Copy the address. Anyone who has this address can send you money. They can also see how much money you have. So be a bit careful with posting it online. That said, it is not secret. It's not like a bank account number where they can withdraw money as long as they know the number.

Put this address in the "withdrawal" field on the exchange.

Wait a few minutes, and you should get a notification saying that there is money in the account.

Now, go to the send tab. Put in the address of the Daily Stormer, and how much you'd like to send. Press the send button, and you're done.

(If anyone could take this "guide," and just make one screenshot for each step with big red circles in Paint, I think this would be a valuable contribution. If you're selling someone a TV you'll get better results if you ask them what they'd use it for, so it seems like it'd psychologically speaking be useful to have a series of instructions for how specifically to do it.)
 
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